How to not write the Tiny Ouroboros

[I]f I fuck me…I’ll fuck me in my own way.
~”Make Yourself,” Incubus

A meta-post if you will. A post about posting. A little off-topic. (A lot off-topic…my cats are playing in and around my roommate’s umbrella as it dries in the living room. Funny as hell.)

Since I’ve started writing this blog I’ve been paying more attention to those posts and articles about blogging. I hate to admit it, but yea, I do check out stuff with titles like “How to get X subscribers!” and “How to make your blog rock!”

And you know what? I generally disregard the advice given. Why? Because the people who write that shit would tell me that the first thing I need to do is quit cursing. Fuck that. I regard that advice about as well as I regard the advice that I should stop cursing when I speak. Unless you’re writing the paychecks, you cannot edit my speech (and even if you are writing the paychecks, I will only edit it when on the clock). I curse. Sometimes more, sometimes less. Put on your big girl panties and deal with it.

I’m not Wil Wheaton. This ain’t Zen Habits or Unclutterer or any other blog. I am Fox, and this is the Tiny Ouroboros. My blog, my writing style. I curse, I don’t always bold the important parts, I don’t always make my posts scannable, and sometimes I talk about shit that has nothing to do with anything.

A Life Reinvented mentioned this same thing. A tendency toward that “This is how you make a great blog!” shit. It’s like people are handing out blog-shaped cookie cutters. I have the feeling eventually we’ll be so damn inundated with top ten lists and “How to…” posts that we’ll only breathe easy when someone doesn’t do it.

I want a blog with a voice. A blog written by a real person with a real life who has something real to say. You can’t find that in a blog that follows the “rules.” Bloggers shouldn’t sacrifice their voice for views. Nor should they sacrifice content or anything else for them. A blog is not about how many people read it. Oh, there are always those people who are terrified that great blogs will languish unless they optimize themselves for search engines. I call bullshit. A great blog will be found.

So if you want to know why I don’t follow all the accepted “rules” for bloggers, that’s why. Fuck that cookie-cutter bullshit. Fuck making “eye catching” or “traffic-driving” post titles. Fuck writing in someone else’s acceptable manner. Fuck making nothing but list and “how to” posts. Fuck writing long posts or short posts, or whatever length is popular at the moment. For that matter, fuck popularity.

Seriously, if you have to sell your soul to make it, you haven’t made it.


6 Responses to “How to not write the Tiny Ouroboros”

  1. Yes yes YES THIS.

    Thank you. This is perfect, and very much like the shit that boils in my head when people talk about this tripe.

    It’s like this “social networking” or “social media” or whatever the fuck is the latest trendy thing to call it. It’s all bullshit. It’s all people kissing one another’s asses, waiting for handouts with their fingers jammed in their ears. It’s all sycophancy and artificiality and poison.

    I’d much rather just be myself, step out of the herd. Fuck what anyone else says, and good for you for expressing it the way you did.

  2. Dargon Says:

    I have seen many blogs that follow the “rules,” and it seems to me that 99% of those are boring as hell. They post an interesting thing from time to time and get passed around the tubes, but for the most part they aren’t worth following. It’s the people that break the mold, write lots of well written and interesting stuff, even if it’s lengthy and full of language (Violent Acres and Greta Christina come to mind), they’re damned fun to read.

  3. Fuck, shit, arse, bastard and cunt. :)

    Blogs that follow the rules are okay, but I enjoy things that are written with a bit more passion and freedom.

    • Dargon Says:

      If you’re going to string expletives, do it like one of the best linguists of all times. It’s: shit, piss, fuck, cunt, cocksucker, motherfucker, tits.

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